[Eds. note: This is the fourth of 14 runner-up posts from the recent Kauai on My Mind Creative Competition.]
C. 2005, Dawn Fraser Kawahara
By the heiau a cloud envelops me
obscuring the river, obscuring the sea,
a rainbow rises, shimmer bridge
from the Hundley Hill pines
to Kalepa ridge
and the plum trees
at the edge where Raymond took his life.
The road drops down to a leaden river,
a tarnished sea, how could it be
that he had had enough
at twenty-five. . .
His name in the roll book
ten years ago comes alive–
the boyish grin, intelligent eyes,
well liked, well grounded,
attends to his work, no trouble
even to a substitute.
After school we’d see him
hefting his golf bag,
power drive, two putts
topping his good short game--
Raymond Napoleon.
Met him again in Waipouli
friendly as ever
white apron wrapping his waist,
his family, he said, was fine.
And Raymond? Fine, just fine,
not much time for golf
working Aloha Diner.
Same grin–the likeable boy
now a likeable man.
On the way to golf
one summer afternoon
we saw a car parked
by the trees that cling to the ledge,
wondered who might have stopped
to look toward O`ahu,
nap on the heiau’s edge.
The next day’s obituary–shock!
as we remembered Raymond.
Later we learned
he’d looped the noose
on a branch of those same trees.
We lash ourselves, so unaware,
oblivious to his pain,
how could we pass so close to his last stand
unknowing, unable
to reach out, hold him
to the promise of his life,
stop our former student friend
from following his dead-end plan.
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4 comments:
This is written so well, and it breaks my heart.
the idea that you passed him as he lay dying is haunting and curiously appropriate. he chose the place of his death with care, and you have honored him with your beautifully written grief.
My mom (Raymond's Aunty Cathay) told me about going to hear you read this at that little coffee shop. She was very moved by your kind recollection of Braddah. I had the kauaibackstory.com card in my wallet all this time and finally came on to read your poem. Words cannot express our gratitude for remembering him and for HONORING his memory. Almost 2 years later, and we STILL miss him. Thank you...
i miss my braddah . there our times a girl need her brother in her life but mines was taken away from me . I missed those special moments in life that i was suppose spend with my big braddah but couldnt 5 years gone but still greatly missed .
<3 always his lil' sister .
P.s. at least you got to have one last look at him whereas i had to be the last to know he was gone. it was heartbreaking cause i was only 8...
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